


50 Dollars to Shit My Pants

by itsobsessive



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: (btw angelica doesnt know theyre all dating at first), Fluff, Gayness, Group chat, Haunted Houses, Holidays, Multi, Polyamory, Texting, Texting format, Ugh, actually not theyre not, but also normal format, but it got deleted, even though that money should really be going to food, i wrote this once before, just like me, my queer children, rich people, so i am angry, therefore they all have a large disposable income, they just dont know how to properly spend money, theyre all rich
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-01
Updated: 2016-11-01
Packaged: 2018-08-28 06:22:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8434975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsobsessive/pseuds/itsobsessive
Summary: johnthelauren: i could reach my hand out and touch your boobs if i wanted tosinnamonroll: please do





	

_i hate??? all of you-Group_

sinnamonroll: guyS GUYS EFKLHBGWLEIJ

adothicc: eliza

johnthelauren: eliza

sinnamonroll: what

johnthelauren: you are literally in the same room as us

adothicc: i am sitting right next to you 

johnthelauren: i could reach my hand out and touch your boobs if i wanted to

sinnamonroll: please do

sinnamonroll: thank you

adothicc: i feel neglected

sinnamonroll: do you want me to touch your boobs

adothicc: trigGE R E D

adothicc: i have no such boobs

sinnamonroll: but you have nipples 

sinnamonroll: for some godforsaken reason 

sinnamonroll: i never understood why males have nipples

sinnamonroll: what child are you going to birth and feed

adothicc: you dont know me

johnthelauren: yOu kNoW mY nAmE nOt mY sToRy!!!!11!!1!!1!1

sinnamonroll: im divorcing both of you

johnthelauren: pls no eliz

adothicc: plz nu we luv u

sinnamonroll: awe okai i guez ill remarry you but just becuz i luv u!! RAWR XDD

johnthelauren: IM GOING TO VOMI T

adothicc: eliza why

adothicc: i trusted you

johnthelauren: wait what did you want in the first place

sinnamonroll: OH RIGHT AKFGKS OKAY

sinnamonroll: DO YOU GUYS WANT TO GO TO A HAUNTED HOUSE TONIGHT

adothicc: FUCC YES

johnthelauren: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

adothicc: WHICH ONE

sinnamonroll: i was thinking the one in riverside

johnthelauren: isnt that one like 50 dollars

sinnamonroll: its two hours long tho

adothicc: yeah we can afford it

adothicc: as long as we dont eat for like a week

johnthelauren: im paying 50 dollars to shit my pants

sinnamonroll: please baby

adothicc: cmon babe please?

johnthelauren: j e sus chr ist

johnthelauren: fine

sinnamonroll: YAY THANK YOU

sinnamonroll: okay now the important stuff

sinnamonroll: r u ready

sinnamonroll: what should we wear

johnthelauren: ooh ooh you should wear those really cute shorts that have the lace at the bottom

adothicc: with black tights and a tank top

johnthelauren: YASSSSS

johnthelauren: we are so gay

sinnamonroll: youre both dating a girl

adothicc: the same girl

johnthelauren: and each other

sinnamonroll: touché

adothicc: how did you get the little thing over the e

sinnamonroll: if i told you the deal would break

adothicc: wait what

johnthelauren: okay now what are we wearing

adothicc: ima wear jeans

sinnamonroll: wear a maroon sweater too

adothicc: aight

johnthelauren: yas bb

sinnamonroll: john you should wear khaki shorts

johnthelauren: are you trying to make me look like a fuckboy

adothicc: and that aztec type thingie sweatshirt

johnthelauren: so yes?

sinnamonroll: do you have vans

johnthelauren: bye

* * *

 Eliza was spraying some setting spray on when she heard a smack from the room near her bathroom. 

"Are you guys making out?" She called. 

"Guess!" She heard John's voice say. She laughed, and emerged from the room to go talk to them. 

When she walked into the bedroom, John and Alex unattached themselves from each other and looked at Eliza. 

Alex whistled. "Damn, Liza."

She laughed. "You two don't look so bad yourselves. What lipstick color should I wear?" They both considered her for a moment before saying, in unison, "Black." She nodded and left them to make out until she emerged with matte black lipstick. 

Alex groaned (in a good way, of course). "Jesus," he said. "You both look so good, I'm not gonna be able to keep my hands to myself tonight." 

Eliza walked up to the bed and wedged herself in between John and Alex.

 "We're going to a haunted house. You're going to be screaming all night," she said, dragging out the last few words. Alex laughed and kissed her, then Eliza kissed John, then John kissed Alex. It was quite a good system, really. 

* * *

_sinnamonroll changed the group name to i spook??? all of you_

adothicc: SCREA KGREN

johnthelauren: okay that was fucking lit

sinnamonroll: tag urself out of all the things we said to the actors

johnthelauren: "JESUS FUCKING SHIT BRO THAT WAS RUDE"

johnthelauren: -alex 2k16

adothicc: "boi if you touch my hair we gon have a little problem" 

adothicc: -john

sinnamonroll: can we talk about the guy who touched my butt with his claws

johnthelauren: and the fact that alex nearly attacked him

adothicc: im protective

sinnamonroll: also lowkey kinkshaming that one guy who kept talking about scabs???

sinnamonroll: also the chainsaw guy was hot im leaving you two for him

addothicc: bitcH HE GRABBED YOU AND DRAGGED YOU THE FUCK AWAY FROM US

sinnamonroll: i signed a consent form

johnthelauren: also

johnthelauren: we are still all in the same room

johnthelauren: and you two look hot

adothicc: remember earlier when we were talking about boob touching

johnthelauren: ye

adothicc: wanna do it

johnthelauren: heck yes

sinnamonroll: aw frick yea

* * *

_sinnamonroll added angelisass to i spook??? all of you_

adothicc: what is she doing here

johnthelauren: HI SIS

angelisass: hi

sinnamonroll: she wanted to talk to us

johnthelauren: about what

sinnamonroll: idk yet

adothicc: i dont like it

angelisass: why dont you trust me

adothicc: you put melted cheese in my underwear

angelisass: IT WAS ONE TIME

sinnamonroll: WHAT DO YOU WANT

angelisass: so

angelisass: last night

johnthelauren: fuck

angelisass: i stopped by eliza's house, right? i wanted to say hi to my baby sister

sinnamonroll: no

adothicc: you did what

angelisass: so i was assuming you two would be there, ofc, you guys hang out all the time

angelisass: so i walk in 

adothicc: im gonna vomit

johnthelauren: please stop

sinnamonroll: angelica

angelisass: and i call for eliza

angelisass: but then

angelisass: i hear moaning 

angelisass: so i walk towards it to hear better

_sinnamonroll removed angelisass from i spook??? all of you_

sinnamonroll: brb

adothicc: what no this was just getting interesting

* * *

_sinnamonroll created a new group-HAHAHA FUNNY STORY_

_sinnamonroll added angelisass to HAHAHA FUNNY STORY_

sinnamonroll: hey sis

sinnamonroll: so how do you do on this fine day 

angelisass: i never got to finish my story

angelisass: so im walking towards the moaning

angelisass: and suddenly i hear what sounds like YOUR VOICE going "JOHN! OH JOHN!" 

sinnamonroll: PLEASE STOP 

angelisass: so im like. well shit. i didnt know they were screwing but okay

angelisass: BUT THEN I HEAR WHAT SOUNDS A LOT LIKE ALEXANDER HAMILTON YELLING YOUR NAME

angelisass: would you like to explain this?

sinnamonroll: well

sinnamonroll: you see

sinnamonroll: angelica

sinnamonroll: theres something i need to tell you

angelisass: no shit

sinnamonroll: so...i am polyamorous

sinnamonroll: and john alex and i are all dating 

sinnamonroll: :)

angelisass: oh

angelisass: so

angelisass: you're not a pornstar?

* * *

i spook??? all of you-Group

sinnamonroll: GUYS

johnthelauren: does she hate you

adothicc: im so sorry liza

sinnamonroll: SHE THOUGHT WE WERE FILMING PORN

johnthelauren: W E A K

adothicc: I AM YELLINGS ,FNDBSLIFBGKJENS

sinnamonroll: I WANT TO MURDER MYSELF 

sinnamonroll: SHE THOUGHT 

sinnamonroll: WE WERE PORNSTARS

sinnamonroll: AND THAT WE WERE FILMING PORN 

johnthelauren: WH E EZIN G

 

 

 


End file.
